


Deep Red

by UnconventionalAnaconda



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU, DCU (Comics)
Genre: AU, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Batfamily (DCU), Drug Addiction, Drug Use, Eventual Romance, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, M/M, NO CAPES, NSFW, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Smut, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-15
Updated: 2021-03-21
Packaged: 2021-03-23 05:54:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 10,935
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30050916
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UnconventionalAnaconda/pseuds/UnconventionalAnaconda
Summary: Roy Harper's world is a grey place. It was only fitting to be hanging around in Gotham, but maybe after meeting someone new he might just give the color red a try.
Relationships: Roy Harper/Jason Todd
Kudos: 11





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not going to lie, this is the first time I've written anything in a long time. I have a lot planned for this story and I'm really excited to share it!

_‘As if there's not a solace in the world that can mend this  
Everything will repeat in the end  
It's not a matter of "if" it's "when" this  
It's happened before, it'll happen again’- Full Circle. _

Roy Harper was yet again in a familiar place on the bathroom floor with an ache in his bones, his limbs are stiff, and his body is cold. He got up with a groan gripping the bathroom sink for support and just hoping he did not look as bad as he felt. As he came face to face with what was supposed to be him in the mirror, he could not recognize himself. He was staring at a stranger. His hair a mess and tangled at the ends with dried blood. His lip was split open and the skin on the bridge of his nose matched. Bruises were found near his eyes and by his cheekbones and there was blood dried and flaky from a cut that ran down the right side of his forehead from a cut closer to his hairline. Roy put his fingers inside his mouth to examine and see if there was any extensive damage.

 _‘What the fuck happened last night?’_ The redhead thought to himself. Honestly, this was not the first time he had found himself in a state like after a night of getting wasted.

After he was done inspecting the damage to his face Roy slowly lifted his shirt trying his best not to put too much strain on his sore body. The left side of his ribs were littered with harsh angry bruises. A particularly nasty one on his left shoulder and a couple around his torso and stomach. After completely stripping himself and leaving the clothes from the night before in a pile in front of the mirror, Roy stepped into the small shower closing the glass door. He turned the water up to an unbearably high temperature and placed his hands in front of him letting his body relax into the water running down him. His long hair cascaded down past his face, the water closed in around him and he shut his eyes.

Roy let himself get lost into the feeling of warmth from the shower and tried to recall the events that took place from the night and for a second, little glimpses of it came back but it was all in a haze of grey like the rest of his world causing a numbness to creep into his mind, and he knew he would rather not remember. He no longer cared.

The water does not stay warm for long at his apartment and even though he missed the warmth that enveloped his body he still needed to clean himself up and maybe the cold water would help wake his mind and body up long enough to take care of the mess that is Roy.

After the shower, the redhead put on a pair of briefs and walked to his small twin bed, sat down and dressed his cuts and scrapes from the night. He was getting good at taping up his knuckles and bandaging his body by himself. Before he let himself rest, he made his way to the area that was his kitchen and grabbed the large bottle of painkillers shaking a few into his hand then washed them down with a short of gin. He could not taste the gin on his tongue anymore, but he felt the burn as it went down.

Roy stared at the dripping sink and knew he should have tried to fix it a while ago, but what was one more broken thing in this small dingy apartment. If you could even call it an apartment. It was more like a large closet with a bathroom. The kitchen, bedroom, and living area were all the same and there was almost no room for furniture. The bed sat on top of a broken-down metal frame that creaked under any weight, the nightstand was a small round surface that could only hold the lamp that was atop it and something small like a phone. At the end of his bed was textbooks stacked to the top of the metal frame and if you were not careful coming into the apartment you would knock down a few of those books. The walls had chipped paint and the ceiling had stains from past water damage. His kitchen contained one long cupboard and a matching surface next to hold the hot plate he used sometimes, next to it was a large sink and next to that was a mini fridge with a shelf above it for dishes. Besides the lamp he had by his bed there was a hanging light fixture in the middle of the room that lit up most of the kitchen area, but occasionally it would flicker, and it did not matter how many times you changed the lightbulb. What space was left was supposed to be the living area but there was just a small trunk where he kept his clothes.

The redhead shook his head and stepped back over to his bed dropping down and throwing his arm over his eyes to try and rest, but the only thing that was there were his thoughts. Maybe tonight he would try and score something a little heavier to try and help him escape.

\--

Rest eventually came to the redhead but only a few hours. He tried to sleep more but there was a restlessness with him, and he was kind of hungry and he also had some work to do that he had been putting off. Roy groaned as he got up and rubbed the sleep from his eyes. He slowly made his way to the cupboard and put some water on the hot plate to get started making food with whatever he had lying around.

He went back to his bed and reached underneath it, grabbing the only thing with value in the place, his laptop that he had built himself. He had a talent for that kind of stuff, and he was good at getting into places online that he had no business being in. It was where he made most of his money just doing small projects here and there, selling information, or fixing issues for people who did not understand how to use computers.

He didn’t get that much done due to not being able to concentrate so he just laid back down getting lost in the grey, until it was late enough that he could justify going out. He got up and grabbed the first pair of jeans he saw in his trunk of belongings, inspecting them he found there to only be a few holes and they were in semi-good condition. Not that he really cared, he only cared that they were clean and that they covered him. He walked back into the bathroom and saw the crumpled pile of clothes he left.

Roy picked up the shirt and sighed, that was his favorite shirt. It might have been salvageable if it was just the blood stains, but there were tears in it. He opened the door and threw the shirt the closest he could to the waste bin and threw his discarded pants into his laundry hamper that sat next to the toilet.

When he saw himself in the mirror, he could see that his face was not so puffy and swollen anymore but some of the bruises had taken on more of a darker color by the right side of his cheekbone. He brushed his long wavy red hair making it soft, not like it mattered since he was just going to put one of his trucker hats on and call it good. He reached behind the door and grabbed one of the button-up shirts that was a faded color of green, rolling the sleeves up he put his hat on and threw on some shoes next to the door, grabbed his wallet and headed out.

\--

He wanted to say he did not have a plan for where he was going for the night, but he found himself out front of a bar that he had been frequently lately. Usually, Roy would go to bars that only had a few old timers that were there every night apart from a few new faces that would stray in. This bar usually had a lot more people in it and most of them were young adults around Roy’s age and normally he did not care for bars that are packed full of college students partying with their friends, but this one was different. This bar had a bartender that the redhead liked. Someone who made him feel less lonely when he talked to her. Like a friend, but he knew better, it was her job, and he was just an idiot. 

The redhead had been here a handful of times and at first it was only supposed to be for the one night. _He had sat down glued to a book, and when the bartender asked him what he wanted he did not even look up, he ordered his drink and didn’t think much of it or even give any attention to the woman taking his order. She came back with his drink and pushed it over to the redhead. Roy looked up after he felt that her presence was still there. She was leaning forward across the bar with her arms folded, her long blonde hair fell over her shoulders and her eyes were a deep shade of blue filled with curiosity as she stretched forward to get a look at what Roy was reading._

_“Are you studying?” She asked when she got a look at what book it was, “That’s some pretty heavy stuff. Are you sure you want to be doing that in a bar?” She let out a small laugh._

_The redhead was slightly stunned by how young she was. After looking around he saw that most of the patrons were also just as young._ _Roy looked back to his book a little confused, “I’m not studying, it’s just something I like to read in my spare time.” He rubbed the back of his head with a lazy smile. He closed the book and put it to the side giving the blonde more of his attention._

_“Oh, I assumed since you’re so young you were in college or something. We see a lot of college students in here.” She then gestured over to the book, “and I don’t usually see people casually reading engineering textbooks. Watch out you’re making the rest of us students look bad,” She let out a light laugh._

_After that Roy talked to her the whole night. She told him her name is Stephanie and that she was working this bar part time and the rest of her time went to college. She came off noticeably confident and open, and at first Roy came off some of the same way. He was charming and all smiles, but after a few drinks and letting down his guard, he opened up to her about things he did not even mean to. She was just so easy to talk to, and underneath she let him see that she was uncertain in herself and she had a lot of self-doubt. It didn’t stop her from bringing up his mood throughout the night though after all the talk of heavy thoughts and feelings, and boy oh boy, did she have a mouth on her!_

_Her laughter still rings in his ear when he leaves the bar. Walking to his apartment with the thoughts of their conversations on his mind. Nights like that were such a rarity for the redhead that he almost forgot about the nightmares he would return to when getting into bed._

As Roy walked in, he scanned the bar seeing that it was not too busy tonight and that was his first stroke of luck for the day. The redhead didn’t think he would be able to handle this place tonight if it was crowded with a bunch of drunk young adults, not until he was fucked up at least. His second stroke of luck was seeing Stephanie at the bar with her huge smile and shiny blue eyes. While making his way to the bar the blonde noticed him and her smile dropped, her eyes had a storm flash across them.

“Harper, you sonuva bitch!” Stephanie shouted at him, drawing everyone in the bar’s attention to him.

“Shit, what did I do?” Roy said out loud to himself. He had an idea this had something to do with last night and cursed himself for not remembering what could have her so mad.

As the blonde got out from behind the bar, she started marching towards him huffing and puffing. When she reached him, she didn’t hesitate to punch his shoulder earning her a yelp of pain from the redhead.

“What the hell, Steph?!” Roy quickly guarded himself in case of another attack. He still smiled at her though, even as he tried to sound upset.

Her eyes never softened, “don’t ‘what the hell’ me!” she slapped him in the arm again, “Look at you!” she used exaggerated hand gestures towards him to make a point, “you shouldn’t even be up and you sure as hell shouldn’t be back here after I spent hours cleaning your blood off the floors last night!”

Roy tried offering her some excuse, but he could not make the words come out, the only thing he could manage was puffs of air and nervous laughter.

“You don’t remember last night, do you?” She was much more serious and calm now when she asked.

“I’m sorry Steph, I really don’t.” He rubbed the back of his head with a sheepish grin, “I do have a question for you though.” He tried to sound serious as he said it.

The blonde was shaking her head and she looked disappointed before she looked up at him, “What question could you possibly have for me?”

The redhead put on the most charming smile he could manage, “I won at least, right? I bet I looked so cool!”

He could tell he won her over after she tried so hard not to crack a smile, “God, Harper. What am I going to do with you?” She smacked his arm again but this time nowhere near as much force as the last times, “you owe my boyfriend for taking you home!” She poked him in the chest to make a point before she went back behind the bar.

Roy found a seat across from where she was standing, “well if I ever get to meet Mr. Mysterious sober, I’ll be sure to thank him and buy him a drink at least.” It bummed him out a little that the one time he got a chance to meet Stephanie’s boyfriend he was too drunk to remember and the fact that he had to see him in such a sorry state doesn’t make for good impressions.

The blonde poured him a drink while lecturing him the entire time, and somewhere he spaced out of what she was saying. He started to scan the room when he locked eyes with what had to have been the most beautiful man Roy had ever seen. He was tall and he was wearing a black shirt that clung to his body in a very flattering way that showed his toned body, and it was paired with a coffee-colored jacket that fit his arms exactly right. His short raven hair had a streak of white in the front and was tousled up. Even from where he was sitting, Roy could see the man’s alarming crystal blue eyes. His nose and cheeks were slightly flushed from drinking which just made him even more beautiful.

“Earth to Roy, are you even listening to me?” Stephanie waved her hand in front of him and he broke his eye contact with the beautiful stranger.

The redhead's face flushed, and he pulled himself up to the bar and brought his chest to his arms while looking into the bottom of his cup, “mmhm, yup!” He tried to look up to smile at her, but he was too flustered.

When he tried to sneak another look at the stranger, he saw that he was no longer looking in the redhead’s direction, but Roy got a good look at his side profile and holy shit, he was perfect. It stole his breath away as he drank in his features. His upper lip pointed out slightly, and Roy could see his cheekbones were high and his jawline was sharp. Everything about this man down to his physical features to the way he held himself was flawless.

Roy tried to focus on anything else because if he did not forcibly stop himself, he didn’t know if he would be able to look away. He was like a deer in the headlights. He pulled his trucker hat down further to hide his face, like trying and erase himself from the room. 


	2. Chapter 2

The other man that captivated Roy was at the other side of the room by the pool table and right now he had Roy’s full attention. Normally by now Roy would have moved on to something harder than beer but he was so focused on the raven-haired man and was still nursing his second one. The redhead liked watching the other man circle the table, he was like a shark about to attack its prey and his walk was powerful. The confidence of his strides, his wicked smile, the way he moved when it was his turn; it was hot.

Roy has always been a fairly good shot and he had nothing else to do tonight, so he thought he might as well try his luck at the pool table. It is not like he could bother Stephanie now that the bar started to get busy. As the redhead advanced towards the pool table, feeling the small buzz he got from the rush of alcohol he consumed, or it was anxiety. A golden haze swirled around the pool table, the ambiance got heavier, and it felt warmer.

The redhead could see whoever the handsome strangers’ opponent was, had lost and did not take it very well. He threw the pool cue down and stormed off spitting venom under his voice almost knocking into Roy.

“Who knew you someone could lose so gracefully,” Roy said with a cheeky smile, following the angry man with his eyes as he stalked off. He moved his gaze back to the winner of the game who only gave a small chuckle as he chalked the tip of his cue stick.

“I almost feel bad taking all these suckers’ money,” the raven-haired man said letting out a small laugh shaking his head slightly.

“How about a new challenge?” Roy stepped up to the pool table, “loser buys the winner a drink.”

His blazing blue eyes locked on to the redhead, “if you just want to buy me a drink that’s all you had to say,” he said smirking.

The redhead could not hide the delight he felt as he grabbed a cue from the wall, excited for the game, “No, I like the idea of you spending all your winnings on me.” Roy taunted with a grin.

Before the game started the other man took his jacket off revealing the skin gripping long sleeve shirt that showed his well-toned shoulders and arms. When the raven-haired man leaned down focusing his eyes on the cue ball, Roy could see every curve and muscle in his back from the way the shirt clings to his body down to his long firm legs in his dark colored jeans that clung to him in the most flattering way. He is truly a work of art, something that should be in an art museum to be admired by all. It was almost seductive watching the way he took the shot and stood back up, straightening himself. His eyes calculating his next move with a strong focus.

Roy desperately tried to pay attention to the game, but his body protested every move he made. He probably could have played through the pain, but he did not know how to handle the man's captivating blue eyes on him. It made him nervous, and he could not keep his concentration.

“You talked a lot of shit just to disappoint me,” the raven-haired man laughed.

“I just want you to think that, so I can crush your ego last second,” Roy teased back at the man, winking.

It took everything in him to concentrate on the game. With a deep breath and some serious focus, he was able to put his head in the game. When Roy looked to his opponent, his smile was gone, and his eyebrows furrowed.

“Told you I’d crush your ego,” and with that Roy sunk the eight ball, winning the game. He tried to play off this win like it was nothing, but his body screamed in pain and he felt sick from the feeling in his stomach with the thought of the other man.

“Next time I’ll win you for sure.” The man pointed his finger at Roy, his smile returning.

The redhead beamed at the idea of more time with him and probably did not hide it very well, “I could get use to free drinks.” Roy laughed.

The raven-haired man stepped away from the table signaling Roy to join him at the bar. Once over there the man knocked on the table getting Stephanie’s attention, “you know what I like, but get something here for my friend too.”

She looked annoyed, “yeah, yeah, I know what you both like.” The blonde made a grumbling noise and reached under her grabbing two glasses.

The man turned his back to the bar putting his elbows behind him for support as he rested his weight, letting his head fall back. His hips jutted out slightly causing his shirt to lift, giving Roy a glimpse of the toned muscle underneath and exposing the perfect v-line; his body is like a car crash and he could not look away. The raven-haired man must have felt his eyes on him, he rolled his head to the side with a smirk on his face and Roy met his eyes, flushed with embarrassment knowing he was caught staring.

“I should charge you with how you’re looking at me,” his voice dripped in honey.

The redhead tried to recover quickly. He laughed thinking that might sell that he was not completely embarrassed, “I was, uh, admiring your-,” he tried to come up with something fast, “shirt.” Roy was mentally kicking himself over how stupid that sounded. “Sports grade?” And here came the word vomit. Roy asked all kinds of questions, not waiting for an answer. Pointed out what brand he thought it was, and went into details about why those kinds of shirts are important in sports, how they are made, etc…

_‘So fucking stupid!’_ He yelled at himself silently. He downed his drink to shut himself up.

“Right,” the man pointed his head down looking at his boots, chuckling to himself.

It went silent for a moment, it was deafening. Roy signaled for another drink from the bartender.

“The name's Roy by the way,” he looked to the man, sticking his hand out.

“Jason,” he said with a hint of a smile on his face as he reached for Roy’s hand. It was a firm handshake, and his hands were a little rough.

The redhead tried not to give away the fact that he didn’t want to let go of his warm hand as his grip tightened and hesitated. He quickly put his hands back to his cup.

Jason’s eyes stayed on Roy, with what looked like confusion on his face. _‘Shit, he definitely noticed.’_ He thought to himself trying not to show any hints of his thoughts.

“Let’s play a drinking game,” Jason suggested with a playful smile.

Roy eyed him closely, “Are you just trying to get me drunk?” He asked with a fake shock.

He leaned in towards the redhead, “and what if I am?” He said softly then followed it with a wink.

Roy could feel himself gravitating to him. _‘He smells good,’_ Was all that he could think.

Luckily, Stephanie stole Jason’s attention before the redhead passed out from forgetting to breathe, “Shots?” She eyed them both.

“You already know,” the raven-haired man smacked his hand on the table and laughed.

“Just don’t get Roy in any trouble _Jason_ ,” her eyes narrowed on him as she spoke his name with a hiss.

He turned to look at the redhead, “I think I want some privacy, let's get a booth in the corner.”

Roy didn’t want to upset the blonde, but he wanted to spend more time with the handsome stranger. Maybe it was a good idea not to have Stephanie lingering. All he could manage was to shrug at her and offer an apologetic smile as he followed behind Jason to a booth.

“How do you know Steph,” the redhead asked as they sat across from each other.

“She’s my brothers’ girlfriend,” he sounded bored with his answer.

The same brother who carried him home and dragged him around. The same brother who probably doesn’t have a high opinion of Roy. _‘Shit’._ By the sounds of it he hoped they were not close, and he hoped he didn’t mention to Jason about some loser he had to carry home.

“Let’s get this game started,” Roy tried changing the subject, clapping his hands together and smiled at Jason.

—

Jason put all his winnings from his games down for the dinks. Before they both started to do some serious drinking, Roy could see Jason had high walls and did not want to talk about himself, but that didn’t stop the redhead, he was patient. He tried to use the drinking game to his advantage to get to know the stranger.

“You keep up pretty well,” the raven-haired man said as they did their rounds of shots.

“This is nothing,” Roy laughed.

Jason started to slow down. He looked at the redhead, but he could not read what was in his eyes, “I may have something to confess,” he started, looking into his empty glass with a small smile on his lips, “I—,” but before he could finish what he was going to say, a man came up to the booth slamming both of his hands on the table.

The raven-haired man looked up with a deep frown on his face, and he did not look amused. The man glared at Roy, making him squirm in his seat. His face was round, and his body looked thick but not fat. The bridge of his nose was covered with a bandage, probably due to a break, and both of his eyes had dark black bruises.

“You shouldn’t have shown your face here,” he hissed at Roy, not acknowledging Jason.

“You shouldn’t have come over here spitting in our faces,” Jason snapped at the man.

The man turned to face him, his face getting red as his anger flared. “I don’t remember saying a goddamn thing to you, bitch!”

Roy could see a rage in the raven-haired man. His blue eyes were on fire, but his face relaxed and he smirked followed with a laugh. The redhead didn’t have time to blink before Jason was on his feet and throwing a punch at the man, connecting the hit to the man’s jaw but not enough to knock him down, just enough to get him stumbling backwards. He caught himself on a table with visible shock from the hit, giving time for Jason to look back to the booth, he grabbed his drink and took the shot.

“Fuck you,” he said then walked over to the man, with lightning quick movements, “and this is for interrupting me,” He threw another punch but this time to the center of his face, causing him to fall to the floor holding his nose as blood gushed out of it. He took another step towards the man and gave a swift kick to the side of his head.

Roy sprung to his feet as he could see the bouncer’s attention fell to the commotion of the fight, and by some miracle it didn’t look like he had figured Jason was the person causing it all. He got behind the raven-haired man and put both of his arms under his, locking him close to his chest. Doing his best to pull him away to dragging him to the exit. The redhead didn’t realize how drunk he was until he was on his feet pulling another person’s weight.

He could see Stephanie lock on to the pair escaping and for a second Roy thought about pretending he didn’t see her, but she looked worried more than anything.

“I’m sorry Steph,” He yelled out before he disappeared in a small crowd of bodies until him and Jason slammed into an exit leading to a back alley.

Jason stumbling away from Roy, “that was fun,” Jason laughed, reaching into his discarded jacket pocket and pulling out a pack of cigarettes. He offered the redhead one, but he declined. He never cared for smoking, or smokers for that fact. The raven-haired man just shrugged him off.

“I guess I pissed that guy off,” Roy adjusted his hat, trying to remember him.

“By the looks of it, it was him who put you in that shape,” he said before lighting his cigarette, taking a long drag.

It was raining now and there was a bit of a chill, but the redhead did not mind. He was preoccupied by the way the dim red light from the neon sign in the front of the bar shined on Jason. The way the color blended on him, smoke mixing with it. Red was definitely his color.

Jason looked over at Roy who was so awestruck by the other man the redhead could have sworn he saw a look of surprise in his eyes. The raven-haired man looked away, sighed, and threw his cigarette then closed the distance between them gripping his shirt in both hands, and for a second Roy thought he might have offended him, and he was in for another beating. The redhead was so wrong, Jason’s lips crashed into Roy’s causing him to wince from the pain, but it was completely forgotten after the shock of the beautiful man's lips on his. He wrapped his arms around his waist pulling him closer returning the same energy that was given to him. He could taste the tobacco on his tongue, something like that would have turned the redhead off, but he was different. It was intoxicating, even the pain was nothing as he pressed harder into Jason.

Jason pulled his head away from him looking at him, his lips were a deeper shade, and his face slightly flushed but he looked smug as his eyes met Roy, who only wanted to kiss him again, “take me to your place.”

Roy’s arms loosened around the others waist so he could pull back from him, searching his face for any kind of indication that he was not serious, “It’s kind of embarrassing,” his eyes darted away.

“It can’t be as embarrassing as mine,” he pulled Roy in for another kiss almost just as needy as the last one, “don’t make me beg,” he pulled him back in with another hungry kiss. How could the redhead say no.

He didn’t want to let him go; he didn’t want this closeness with him to cease. Why could they not stay like that, a moment frozen in time. He leaned in again kissing him for a while, “okay,” he said against his lips, “but don’t say I didn’t warn you. It’s not pretty.” He pulled himself away from Jason, trying not to let his stare linger on him before slipped behind him wrapping his arm around his waist, and pulling out of the alley onto the rainy streets. 


	3. Chapter 3

By the time they got to his apartment building, both were soaking wet from the rain. Once by the entrance Jason fell into the wall next to the door and pulled the redhead into another kiss with urgency. Both of their bodies pressed together, and both of their hands explored each other. Jason’s touch got softer after feeling the bindings around the redhead’s lower torso and stomach. The raven-haired man pulled away from the heated kiss, pushing his face into his neck. What started as small kisses, turned to licking, to bites. It was driving Roy insane. He wanted to touch the man more, but he was nervous, and he felt as though the beautiful man might disappear if he gave into the want of raiding his body with his touch.

“I like the way you sound when I bite you,” Jason said smiling against his neck.

Roy could not help but laugh. He took his hands off Jason’s hips and pushed them into dark wet hair pulling his head up and taking him into a deep kiss. Smiling against his lips as he made a muffled moaning sound. They both were getting lost to the heat until the door to the building swung open catching both of their attention but paid no mind the person exiting the building. The only thing the redhead had on his mind was the other man.

“Let’s get inside,” Roy managed to say between kisses.

Once inside they did not separate from each other causing one another to stumble over each other in the hallway, making the both of them laugh. Before they had gotten inside of the apartment, they leaned against the front door. Jason was taking his shirt off and Roy was working on getting the door open. Jason kept his shirt between his teeth, closing the distance with the redhead, immediately pushing his hands to Roy’s pants, trying to undo them. By the time he got the door was opened they took a tumble to the floor, knocking the textbooks by the bed to the floor. The raven-haired man was laughing, but the redhead could not join in because he felt that one. Jason took his breath from him figuratively and literally from falling on top of him. He looked so beautiful, but everything hurt, and Roy was groaning.

“Oh shit, sorry you’re probably in no state to be catching me,” Jason had worry in his voice, but his laughter did not stop.

Roy waved his hand at him trying to brush off the concern, “I’m fine,” but his voice betrayed him.

“Let me make it up to you,” the raven-haired man said with a low voice.

He undid the rest of the buttons to the redhead’s shirt moving his hands up his chest, leaning down pressing kisses to his collarbone. He made his way down his chest to his abdomen leaving softer kisses to the places that were bandaged, “I hope my kisses help,” he said against Roy’s body stopping at the harsh bruises, his eyes cast upward to look at him. The redhead softly let his head fall; his kisses did help him forget the pain.

“Fuck,” Roy whispered. He was gorgeous and it made his head spin with the feel of his wet mouth tasting him. It might also have been the alcohol, but right now Jason had him feeling a certain kind of way.

The raven-haired man moved lower and lower laying soft kisses all over the redhead. His fingers hooked the rim of his underwear and jeans, bringing them down inch by inch and gently running his tongue near his hips. Every time the redhead looked down Jason’s fiery blue eyes were watching him, causing a buildup in his gut and a tingly feeling all over his body.

The other man smiled up to Roy, lifting himself causing Roy to make a small sound of protest as the warmth left him, “don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere,” he said as he started to undo the redheads pants fully and tugging them down. From there he went back down to where he had been before, but his underwear was much easier to push down. It was slow but Roy loved the sensation of kisses that spread from his lower abdomen down to his thighs until finally the beautiful man moved his underwear down exposing Roy. His first instinct was to try and cover himself, but Jason kept a firm grip on his legs. He slowly ghosted his lips over the tip of his cock. He planted slow kisses to the tip, working his way down to his shaft and then dragging his tongue all the way back up to the top. Jason grabbed the stem of his cock with one hand and put the tip in his mouth and started to gently suck on him.

“God,” Roy breathed out as the warmth of Jason’s mouth enveloped him, it made his head hazy. The feeling of his hand gripping his hip and warmth of his body was almost too much for him to handle causing him to feel a little overwhelmed with all the sensations devouring him.

He looked down to the other man, this time his eyes were closed, and Roy focused on his long dark eyelashes, the way his face was slightly flushed, and got lost in every detail in his face, watching him bob his head up and down at an excruciating slow pace. Then he opened his eyes, his blue eyes locking with the redhead’s emerald ones. He took the entirety of Roy out of his mouth and began to swirl his tongue around the tip, teasing him, and the redhead did not dare look away while Jason gave him the show.

Roy threw his hands to his face giving out small laugh to himself as he realized how stupid his face looked watching this beautiful man between his legs, “Are you even real,” he pushed arm up to his face covering his eyes to hide his embarrassment.

Roy could feel a kiss planted to his shaft, “I want you to look at me,” Jason whispered.

He looked back down meeting his eyes once again, and in an instant he swallowed him letting his eyes flutter close, his head bobbed faster now, no longer teasing him. It took everything in Roy not to throw his head back getting lost in the pleasure. He kept his eyes on the raven-haired man, watching as he drooled around his cock. He reached out one hand tangling his fingers into his hair while the other searched for his hand, entangling their fingers together, both squeezing each other.

“Wait, wait,” Roy gasped, “I’m going to cum, stop,” he whined, giving small tugs to the raven hair. It did not stop him, it only seemed to encourage him. Swallowing the redhead with more of a focus and doing something with his tongue Roy could not begin to explain.

His body tensed up, feeling the buildup and not being able to stop it. He tried again to grab at his hair again, but Jason locked both of his palms with his. He tried to keep his eyes on him just like he asked but he could no longer keep his head up. He threw his head back as he came, moaning louder than he meant to.

He looked down to the other, his body shuddering. His slick raven hair clung to face and his eyes meeting the redheads half lidded stare.

“I’m sorry,” he sighed, “that was too good,” he trailed off. Jason’s hands let go of Roy’s, moving them back to his hips humming around the redhead’s cock causing him to squirm from the over stimulation. 

He finally released the redhead, “I couldn’t help myself,” he teased.

He continued to stare at Jason, his lips swollen and red. He pushed himself up with his elbows, “you’re so gorgeous,” he said in awe.

He was thrown off guard by the compliment, pulling himself up creating distance between the two. He put one of his hands to his mouth wiping away any remaining fluids, “shut the fuck up,” he said quietly darting his eyes to the side.

The redhead shot up grabbing ahold of the other by the back of his neck. He kissed him with the same hunger he had before, pushing his tongue into his mouth relishing in the lewd sounds he made against the redhead’s lips. Roy put his forehead against Jason’s, smiling as he looked in his clouded blue eyes, “Now, how are we going to shut me up, because if we don’t find something, I won’t be able to stop telling you how stunning you are,” he laughed.

Jason gave a small laugh in return, “you’re an idiot.”

Roy hummed in agreement.

He got on to his knees pulling Jason up, kissing him. They used each other for support to stand up, both wobbling slightly. He started leading him to the small twin sized bed. With no more patience in the redhead, he roughly got the other’s jeans undone giving them a firm tug, sitting him down as he fell to his knees. He wanted to make him feel good, he wanted to hear him become a mess of moans. He wrapped one hand around the bottom of his shaft and swallowed the man quickly, coating his cock with saliva. The raven-haired man let out a long moan. Roy’s hair fell around his face, but Jason tunneled his fingers up the sides of his head pulling his hair out of his face.

He let his tongue stretch out letting saliva run down his cock while bobbing his head. Jason bucked his hips slightly while using his grip on Roy’s hair to keep the steady movement. The redhead pulled his head up to breath better, sucking on the tip and using his hand to quickly pump the rest of the length. He tried his best to keep his mouth and hand in sync. Jason’s breathing started to pick up. Roy released him with a wet popping sound, smiling as he watched his head fall back getting lost into the quick movements of Roy’s hand. He played around with him some, rubbing his thumb over tip and changing the tempo to longer strokes that would slow and then pick back up. Jason gripped the bed sheets and rolled his head down, but kept his eyes closed, his mouth hung open. Roy watched as his chest would rise and fall. The redhead took Jason back into his mouth, hollowing his cheeks and using his hand for what he could not take.

“That feels great,” he moaned, “I’m close, fuck,” his eyes were clouded over as he watched Roy. His mouth was still open as he made soft moans.

Roy could feel the raven-haired man tense up and the movements were getting a lot more erratic, unable to keep a rhythm. There was something with the climax that excited Roy, his arousal building again as he listened to the noises the other made. He wanted to taste him, and he wanted to feel the pulse of muscles inside his mouth.

Jason shot up tangling his hands in Roy’s hair, “fuck, fuck, I’m going to—”, he hunched over, his body stilling, and his hands gripped Roy’s hair tightly as he came, keeping him in place. The redhead quickly swallowed him stopping his movements, but continued to suck gently, waiting for Jason to relax before he slowly moved his head. 

“I thought you were straight,” Jason said falling to his back, “no way that was your first time doing that.” He stared up at the ceiling trying to catch his breath.

“First time I enjoyed doing that,” Roy laughed. He had never been turned on giving someone head before.

He picked himself off the floor feeling a little dizzy. He stepped over to the long cupboard to pour himself a shot of gin.

Roy looked back to the raven-haired man who was now propped up onto his elbows watching him, “want a drink? It’s gin or I can get you some water.”

“I’ll have some gin,” he sat up, “any ice?”

“Nope,” he poured the gin into two cloudy glasses.

“Fuck it,” Jason got up moved over to the redhead and took a glass. Immediately shooting his head back downing the drink. His face twisted and he shook his head, “burns.”

Roy laughed, downing his drink. “I can’t taste anything.”

Jason poured himself another shot and threw his head back but did not swallow. He grabbed the back of the redhead’s neck pulling him in, kissing him, urging him to open his mouth. Roy complied and felt the liquid transfer to him, some spilling down the side of his mouth. He swallowed the warm liquor mixed with the taste of Jason. The kiss continued to deepen, and their tongues explore each other’s mouths.

Jason pulled away from the kiss and pushed his body closer to Roy’s. The redhead pushed him back to the bed and broke contact as the other landed on the creaking bed. They both discarded their jeans, winding down and slowly getting to know each other’s bodies. The rooms temperature only continued to rise as the two made out and rubbed their bodies against each other, both were too exhausted to do anything else.

It was a tight fit, but the two clung to each other on the small twin bed. Their legs intertwined with each other and Jason wrapped his arms around the redhead’s neck keeping him close. Roy found himself falling asleep to the feeling of the other man’s soft breathing and the sound of his beating heart.

—

Roy felt groggy waking up, his body was stiff but at least he was in his bed. The memories from the night before flooded his mind. He shot up and looked around the room, he was alone. No trace of the beautiful man from last night. He leaned over to see if maybe he was in the bathroom, but the door was open, and it was just as cold and empty as the rest of the place. His mind was filled with red at the thought of the other man, but the rest of his world was still grey.

“Did I dream I came home with him last night?” Roy asked out loud, confused. There was no way someone as attractive as him came home with him last night, right? All the evidence around him said otherwise.

He got up picking his clothes off the floor, but he could not find his shirt. He looked under his bed thinking it might have got pushed under there. There was a shirt under there, but it was not his. “Jason,” he said under his breath, grabbing the shirt. Getting up he held the black shirt in his hands just staring at it, unable to figure out what to do with it. He could use it as an excuse to talk to him again, but he did not know where to find him. He could talk to Stephanie, but it felt a little creepy… Maybe he would come back for it? ‘ _It is a nice shirt_ ,’ he thought to himself, ‘ _he probably couldn’t get out of here fast enough_.’

He could smell Jason on the shirt, and it caused something to stir inside of him. The smell of the raven hair man is intoxicating to him. Before he let his mind drift back to the night, he threw the shirt on his bed, and walked into the bathroom. A cold shower would do him some good.


	4. Chapter 4

A week passed without Roy even realizing it. He had gotten a new project that sucked up all his time, it was more of a personal project so when he was not working on it, he was working on other small things to help him _actually_ make money, just enough to get by at least. That also meant no trips to the bar for a while until he got this done.

He kept the shirt the beautiful man left on the back of his bathroom door and some nights he would hold onto it just to try and get that intimacy back. It felt pathetic, but he would usually be on his way to drinking himself to sleep before he got hung up on caring. On the first two days he let his mind wander to the other man often. The hazy memory of his hair clinging to his face, his erratic breathing, his face flush with a red tint, and the way his deep voice sounded dripping in pleasure. It was torture for him! How did this man take up so much of his mind? It stopped the nightmares for the first few nights, but they returned like they always do.

\--

_His footsteps heavy on the ground as he runs through an endless void, a darkness that stretches from all sides. He does not know why he is running, but he knows he must. There is a voice this time. A man’s voice that is faintly familiar, “you have to run. Don’t let it catch you,” it whispers._

_Roy tries to keep running but he slows no matter how hard he pushes his legs, “Where do you want me to go!” He is not asking, “there’s nothing here,” he stops. Defeated._

_“You have to run,” it’s the voice again with urgency, “please,” it begs softly._

_For a second he thinks he can see a shape in the empty abyss, so he runs after it. Trying to reach out towards it, his hands desperately outstretched._

_He does not slow; Roy practically throws himself at the shape. As soon as he connects, he knows something is not right. The voice does not belong to the thing that catches him. The figure is grotesque, it twists around cutting his throat. He is bleeding out and it is laughing. It makes his head ring; he wants to scream but he can only choke._

_Choking._

Roy rolls out of bed falling to the floor choking on his vomit. He tries to run to the bathroom barely making it. He feels the acid burns his throat causing tears to come to his eyes as he pukes for what felt like an eternity. He leaned over the cold ceramic sink washing his mouth out.

He looked in the mirror disgusted by what he saw. Pathetic. A rage fills him, and he does not know what to do. He falls to the floor laughing, he thinks of his dream. He grabs his throat; tears start threatening to spill.

\--

Roy let go that night, right back where he knew he would be. A belt wrapped around his arm again, a spoon filled with tar again. Everything was spent and gone, for a second it never felt so good. He tripped and now he was falling, but something about this fall was different than all the others. Just like the dream, something is wrong. This is not right. Roy let himself crumble to the floor and began clawing at the thick brown belt on his arm, unbinding himself. He rolled to his side staring at all the individual markings on the floor, letting each wave wash over him, heavier than the next.

Something about time became more of a concept rather than reality in that moment and he felt like he was floating free from everything. A calm that helped him forget the grey, but it also erased the red.

Distantly something called him, the voice from the dream, “you’re going to be okay,” the voice faded, and it was hard to figure out what it meant by that. He floated in nothingness, _‘I am okay,’_ he thought.

“What did you do?” The voice was sharp.

Everything faded away into silver. Instead of a grey Roy felt like he was surfing silver, and for a moment he was fine being comfortably numb.

For a moment it felt like floating, then falling into a cloud wrapping him in warmth. All too soon there was a light that stirred his senses and brought him to reality. The soft warmth began to turn into a burn. The redhead rolled to his back; all his movements felt sluggish. Before he processes what was happening, he was being pulled back to his side.

“Nnnh,” was the only sound he could manage to make. He tried to open his eyes, but the light was too much strain on him. He caught a glimpse of a figure.

Something pressed against his lips, “drink, it’s water,” the familiar voice said with an edge, but not unkindly.

The light was gone now, but the heat remained, burning him up. He could feel his body was sticky from sweat. Roy’s senses were coming back, he was no longer swimming in the silver. His mind was still cloudy, and reality was coming to him slowly. The redhead tried to turn to his back but there was something pressed to his back stopping him. This sure as hell was not his bed, it was too soft to be his. He started to open his eyes looking around an unfamiliar room. He was facing towards a long window, and he could see it was dark outside, but not much of anything else. The clouds covered the moon letting no light escape from them making it hard for his eyes to focus on anything. The redhead looked behind his shoulder and saw that the something that was blocking him from turning, was actually a someone.

“Jason?” Roy’s voice was hoarse. He sat up to turn towards the raven-haired man. He reached his hand out brushing a stand of soft hair. The redhead could not make out his features very well, but the white streak in his hair was hard to miss. When standing he lost his balance a little and was met with the realization, he did not have any pants on.

Roy reached back over to the sleeping man, “Jason,” he tried to shake him. The raven-haired man was startled, pulling back immediately, “shit, sorry,” the redhead raised his hands up.

“Oh, you’re finally awake,” his voice was laced with sleep. His posture relaxed a little, “the light switch is over there,” he pointed behind him. 

Roy cautiously walked to the wall turning the lights on. He was able to soak in his surroundings a little more. The entire wall that the bed was pressed against was covered in books, the whole bookshelf built into the wall. There was a painting with heavy uses of gold paint that went well in with the colors of Jason’s red sheets. On the other side was a long dresser that had a record player at the corner and a single framed photo. Honestly, if the redhead did not feel so sick, he might even be in shock with how nice everything is, so neat and organized. “Where am I?”

“My place,” he had his face buried in the crook of his arm shielding his eyes away from the light. He sounded exhausted, “I didn’t want to leave you alone. You were out since last night,” his voice started to trail off.

Roy found himself swallowing hard at that, “I…” he was at a loss of what to say.

Jason lifted his arm and looked at the redhead, “If you’re going to apologize, save your breath. If I did not want to take care of you, I wouldn’t have. Don’t thank me either, I don’t want to hear it.” He then rolled to his side and pulled the blanket further over his shoulder, “now that you’re awake I don’t have to take care of you.” There was a pause, “bathroom is down the hall and there’s some water on the nightstand. Do not wander and be quiet. I’m not supposed to be home.”

His voice sounded annoyed, but it made Roy smile, “got it.”

With that he turned around walking out the door, looking outside of the room there was a long hallway. The redhead was not sure which way to turn.

“Left!” Jason said, like he could read his mind.

The hallway was dark causing it to look like it went on forever, and Roy did not want to chance turning on the light in case it alerted anyone. He did not know who he would be running into. Jason was a stranger to him and his house even more. Roy took the chance to open the first door he came to, his anxiety spiking as he slowly opened the door. ‘ _Please don’t be someone’s bedroom_ ,’ he thought to himself as he peeked inside. 

It was the bathroom, and it was huge. The redhead gawked at the room as he flipped the light on. The first thing he was met with was a mirror that took up most of the wall giving him a full view of everything and making the room look much bigger. He slowly moved in closing the door behind him. Half of the room was split by a glass wall and inside was an oval white porcelain bathtub and across from that was the stainless-steel shower head that was attached to the ceiling. The room was beautiful, but it lacked any kind of energy. Everything was so neat and clean, like one of those open house models. It was like no one had ever used it. Even the bottles of soap matched the black and white interior. Some of the only color in the room came from a small green plant that was in the corner by the sink. Something did not sit right with him using the room.

The redhead stripped his clothing and did his best to avoid looking at himself in the mirror, but he could not avoid it. The mirror made it impossible not to look at the mess he is. His red hair was surprisingly a lot less of a mess, but still looked thin and dry. His emerald eyes looked tired and dull, underneath them were dark circles causing him to look grim. At least most of the bruises were healing, taking on a yellow shade. The cut on his nose was nothing more than a thin red line now. Now that Roy could really see himself in a brightly lit room, he felt so ugly. ‘ _So fucking ugly_ ,’ he thought bitterly about himself.

He took a cold shower in hopes it would cool him down the suffocating heat that engulfed his body. It felt so awkward showering in someone else’s place, especially in a place that he did not feel he belonged.

The shower helped make him feel better, but his mind was still cloudy, and his body ached. Roy put his briefs on but thought it would be for the best to keep his shirt off for a while. Once he stepped out of the room, he could hear an echo of sound traveling through the hallway. It was coming from just a few doors down and maybe Roy should have minded his own business, but he could not help floating to the sound. As he approached, he could hear someone sobbing and the voice of another person, the voice was deep and rough, but could not make out what the voice was saying. He kept at the slow pace getting closer and now he could hear a slapping sound and under the sobbing a weak voice begged.

 _‘Turn back around!’_ He shouted at himself. Instead, his feet betrayed him and kept moving towards the sound. He wasn’t stupid he knew that sound of skin smacking skin, the grunts and occasional moaning.

The door was open a crack, but Roy did not dare look inside. He kept his distance and listened to the brutal pace. He could hear everything clearly; they were both men.

“Please,” the weak voice pleaded through sobs, “I can’t—” he was interrupted by a slap, making the voice yelp.

“You were so cocky earlier, and I’m not done ruining you yet,” the other man said in a deep husky voice. The voice sounded older than the other.

Roy started to feel flustered as he listened to the two of them and began to quickly make his way back to Jason’s room.

As he entered the room, he couldn’t help but chuckle to himself, “Hey Jason, is there anyone else here?”

He sighed a little before sitting up, “there shouldn’t be. They’re all supposed to be out of town,” he paused before looking at the redhead, “why?” He looked suspicious of him.

He could not stop himself from laughing, “no reason,” he turned to try and hide the stupid look on his face. He attempted to suppress his laughter; he didn’t even know why he thought it was so funny.

“What did you see?!” He focused on the redhead.

Roy shook his head, looking back at Jason, his face had a look of annoyance across it from the lack of his response, “nothing, nothing,” he tried to say it without smiling, but failed.

Jason threw the covers away from him and stormed over to the door, “For fucks sake,” he tried to step around the redhead, but he pushed his body against the door. Jason stopped, glaring at him, “move.”

“No,” Roy said quietly, “I swear, look at my face, I swear I saw nothing!” It was technically the truth. He tried to sound more serious but broke out in another smile at the end.

Jason laughed nodding his head, “Yeah? For some reason I don’t believe you.”

The raven-haired man tried to pull Roy from the door, but the redhead took the opportunity to pull him closer, kissing him. The kiss surprised him, but he relaxed into it. Jason took it further and pushed his tongue into the redhead’s mouth. Roy tunneled his fingers through the back of Jason’s hair trying to deepen this kiss, but Jason slipped his grip and pushed him to the side pulling the door open and rushed into the hallway. Before he escaped, he grabbed him by the waist attempting to pull him back into the room, but the redhead found himself getting lightheaded. Nausea rushed over him and he stumbled back finding himself going to sit on the ground.

Jason looked back, “You good?” His playful smile was replaced with concern.

Roy took it as an opportunity, and he did not particularly want to be worried over. “Oh no! I’ve succumbed to this sickness that will surely kill me if you leave,” He fell back throwing his hand up to his face dramatically, “please sir, take me into your bed and care for me,” he peeked at Jason before going back to his dramatic act.

Jason laughed, “you’re so full of shit,” he walked back into the room closing the door stepping over the redhead, “Aren’t you afraid I might ravish you in such a state?” He said playing along.

Roy threw his head up to look at the man with a mock expression of surprise and gasped, “You might?!” The redhead’s expression changed to a cheeky grin, “I was hoping you would,” he said winking.

The raven-haired man laughed, “You’re such an idiot,” he offered out his arms to the redhead.

“Please be gentle,” the redhead fake pouted. He took his hands and let Jason help him up and gathered whatever energy he could to pull him on to the bed, pinning him. He stared into his crystal eyes finding himself hypnotized by the other man's beautiful looks, once again.

“If you don’t stop looking at me like that, I’m going to pluck your eyes out,” the raven-haired man said, interrupting his thoughts.

“You’re just so—,” he was interpreted by Jason pushing his head up and smashing his lips into his.

“Seriously, shut the fuck up,” he pulled his hands free from the redhead and tangled his fingers into the long red locks, “Don’t be so soft,” he smirked and pulled him into another deep kiss.

Roy pulled away to breathe and moved his body to the side of Jason, “I’m not feeling too hot,” he said rubbing the sides of his head.

Jason got up and handed Roy the glass of water on the nightstand, “drink this.”

It was not until he started to drink it that he realized how thirsty he was and started to chug it down. He started to get under the cover when Jason turned the light off and crawled back into bed next to him.

The redhead could not fall back asleep no matter what he tried, and he felt tense being so close to the other man. It wasn’t like when he was drunk, and his anxiety made him feel like a burden to him. He turned to face Jason who was fast asleep. As Roy watched him, he started to notice his face scrunching and his body twitched. He was having a nightmare the redhead realized. Without thinking, he moved in closer and pulled Jason to his chest, holding him close causing the raven-hair man to stir. He wrapped both of his arms around Roy’s waist squeezing him and buried his face into his chest.

He started to doze off as he breathed in the man’s intoxicating scent. It relaxed him and he felt amazing being wrapped in his arms.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to try and upload a chapter every week :)  
> I really appreciate everyone who takes the time to read this! I have a lot more planned for this story so I hope you all like it!


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